I don’t go to his vile parties.
His gluttony and drunkenness disgust me.
But, the King has summoned me.
He wants to parade me before his “friends.”
With seven-day-old wine-laced slurs,
Ahasuerus, my husband, has commanded I dance
wearing the Crown Royal.
Only the Crown Royal.
Dictating what I wear in public
To “show the people and the princes my beauty.”
My beauty is not his trophy.
He flatters me with his words
and cuts me with his commandments,
doing both without a second thought.
As though I were one of his empty vessels of gold.
I am the back-story,
The history he wants to ignore.
But I will not be forgotten.
I will haunt his loud drunken dreams.
Wearing velvet robes of purple dignity
With my bare head held high,
refusing his gaudy crown
I will show him who the queen is.
I am not just another pretty face
Willing to dance her way onto the throne.
“The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.” -Coco Chanel
I am royalty.
I am Queen Vashti of Persia.
I am the spirit he could not control
Strong enough to be the defiant villain in the story.
I am the mind he could not manipulate.
I am the bitch that said “No.”
I know what fate lies before me
and it does not scare me.
I have refused to submit to him.
I have embarrassed him.
I can live with myself
even though I am dead.